Written by Menswear Style
Tips & Advice
5th May 2020
/ 10 First Date Tips for Men (from Women)
A few years ago, online dating wasn’t all that familiar. In fact, many couples who met online weren’t willing to share that they met online. Today, however, online dating is the norm. We meet and interact with more people online than ever before, and online dating makes the whole dating scene more accessible to everyone. Still, online dating is not without its challenges. Having conversations online, exchanging pictures and videos, and getting to know each other can only go so far. At some point, you still have to go on a first date with the person on the other end of the line. This is often a very challenging part of dating for men, but we spoke to some women with experience in the dating field and we have the following top 10 tips for you to keep in mind.
It Starts Before the Date
Here’s a secret you want to value if you are serious about online dating: be genuine. The success of your first date isn’t just determined by that date alone. The experience starts far before the actual date, from the online dating profile you create for yourself and how you communicate with your match. JustKiss, a popular online dating site, overcomes this issue with its intuitive sign-up wizard. When you first visit the site, you’re asked a few questions to determine who you are and the kind of partner you are looking for. The site will then automatically match you with potential partners. Being genuine is the way to go. If you start your online dating experience with exaggerations and false information, no first date can save you. You will still come up short and you lose the ability to develop a genuine relationship with the other person.
Show Up on Time
This may seem like a simple tip that everyone knows, but you’d be surprised by how much women get disappointed by men being late to their first dates. Not even a 15-minute delay is acceptable if it is the first time you are meeting the other person. You want to show up on time for the date. Showing up early is okay if you are not too early, but anything earlier than 15 minutes before the agreed time is also a bad thing. You will end up waiting and ruining the mood for the date.
Pick a Relaxing Place
Going to a rock concert on your first date may seem like a good idea at first, but it is not the kind of activity you want for this particular occasion. You want the first date to be simple and relaxing so that you have plenty of opportunities to get to know each other. Act decent too. If the two of you are going out for dinner, be sure to pick a place that you both like. Offer to treat her but prepare to respect her decision to split the bill. Make sure you also pay attention to her comfort levels during the date.
If you don’t normally wear a suit, you don’t have to wear one on your first date just to impress. Yes, you want to dress well, but don’t go too far beyond what you would normally wear. Your first date is all about being genuine and showing who you really are. There are times when dressing up is recommended, such as when you have a dinner in a fancy restaurant planned for the evening or a trip to the theatre. Make adjustments to how you dress to suit the occasion. Avoid dressing down and appearing like you haven’t put any effort in.
Yes, this too is a simple tip that often gets neglected. You really don’t want to smell bad on your first date, because it can ruin your image no matter how well you dress for the occasion. Take a shower, do some personal grooming, and spray your favourite fragrance to complete your look. We have a lot of fashion tips on this site, but there are also plenty of fragrance and aftershave reviews for you to browse through. Finding a fragrance that suits you is a matter of knowing what you like and picking an aftershave that complements your natural body odour.
Don’t leave your first date to chance. You want to be meticulous with how you plan the date. If it’s an evening date, plan other things to do after dinner just in case the two of you don’t want the night to end so quickly. The same is true for when you’re having a lunch date. Have two or three more activities lined up so you don’t run out of steam after the first one. A movie after dinner or a long walk to a rustic part of the city is a good example of additional things you can plan to keep the night exciting.
Take (Enough) Charge
Another mistake to avoid is letting one person control everything about the date. You should both provide ideas and suggestions to increase the likeliness you’ll both enjoy it. For instance, you want to figure out the activities she likes, but not have her plan the entire evening. There is a good reason for this. Most women are impressed by men who can find that sweet spot between freedom and control. You are showing respect and taking her likes into considerations, but without appearing out of control or asking her to plan everything for you.
Okay, listen up: the first thing that comes out of your mouth when you meet her for the first time must – and we do mean MUST – be a compliment. Women want to know how men think about them, and your date is no different. Complimenting her as soon as the two of you meet is a great way to break the ice. Be genuine too. Don’t just compliment her to get a conversation going; you can also go beyond looks by telling her that you feel comfortable around her.
Have a Conversation…
Stop talking about yourself all the time. As fun as that may be, you will quickly turn off your date if all you talk about is yourself. Have a genuine conversation about topics that interest both of you to make the date a truly special one. This is where online dating actually helps. You already have conversations with her online, so all you need to do on your first date is talk about things that you already know she is interested in. Pick up a new book that she might like or read up on her working industry before the first date.
…or Prepare a Few Questions
If you are not sure about whether you can keep a conversation going, prepare a few questions to ask her. It is much better to have her tell stories than to talk about yourself most of the time. Ask about her day and how things are at work. Light topics work best in this situation. Questions about her favourite Netflix series or a book that she has been reading will keep you going. You can even talk about her dream job or if she has an ideal vacation in mind. That’s it! These tips are provided to you by women who are actively dating online, so pay attention to them if you want to have a successful first date. They will land you that second date without fail.